Memories... so sad, or so beautiful... and so... haunting. It's weird. One moment to the next... is different, time leaves you behind. You can`t help but wonder... that if you said something differently, or tried harder... would you still be living in those memories? Sometimes it's hard to belive that God has you right where he wants you... either because you think you had it so good... or you miss the past or just don`t understand any of what happens. When you wake up late at night you think of this, and it makes you sad, and angry... or you just feel so lonely. Then you drift off into a dream of what was, or what might be, or what is... and in the morning your shoes don't fit. Maybe you've been changed all along. Have I changed? Somehow I believe I have, and not for the better. I`m happy, and hopeful, and glad at the world... but untrusting still. Who knows. Perhaps somehow I will benefit from this time.