Gilbert made me borrow A Mark, A Mission, A Brand, A Scar. That`s right, MADE me. He pulled his C.D. player out in Chemistry and told me to listen. The first track on it is Hands Down, but its a little different from the Hands Down I have. I like them both, each for their diffrent reasons. But I was listening to it and I got all emo. It was weird. I even.. teared. One tear rolled down my cheek... Isn`t that so dorky? But I was thinking about the words... and... I really don`t know what happened to me for a second there. So... I listened to Dashboard all through Chemistry... and then I go to return the C.D. and player to Gilbert and he goes, "You can borrow it," and I`m like, "Are you sure?" And he told me, "Take it" An` so I happily listened to Dashboard all through Lunch and Algebra II. It was the highlight of my day and Gilbert doesn`t know what it meant to me... just to listen to a little música and keep me sane. Today was a bad day. I`m not on the program for the god damned play and I approach Mr. Rehm about is I`m in the play or not. So he asks me if I`d been to all the rehersals, I tell him that I`ve been to some... (I really have been to quite a few.) And he says, "Well??" It sounded like he meant... you haven`t been to ENOUGH to be in the play. Thats basically what I got out of that. So now I`m pissed off as hell and I call my Dad to come pick me up because there is no fucking way I`m going to stay somewhere where I`m not wanted not to mention, somewhere I don`t want to be... So my Dad comes to pick me up and my Mom has made him promise to go talk to Mr. Rehm... so he asks him if I`m in the play or not.. and my Dad says that he says I am.. and that he never told me I wasn`t. I never said he said I wasn`t.. I SAID it sounded like I was unwanted and it sure looked like it too. So now I`m pissed off and more then ever don`t want to be part of this play. I mean hell, I`m not even on the shitty program so.. who`d miss me?? No one wants me there either.. all the damned theatre people hate me... or so it seems... and I`m not fond of them... AT ALL. But.. I have to go tonite because my parents are making me... and I mad as hell. I wanna cry.