Looking Through You

It's lovely to see how we imagine ourselves to be when we're older. I wonder if we really will save the world one day and how much more beautiful we'll all be, someday.

I'm supposed to be getting dressed but my sisters are asleep infront of my closet... and I don't wanna wake them up, despite my loud music playing. Anywho! Most likely, Tabitha and I are going to host a Christmas Shin-dig and Girl Sleepover Extravaganza. I think we'll invite the kids from school and then after that the coolest girls we know will come over for a second party. {Sarah, Carly's...etc.} Anywho I think that'll be neat and I won't have to buy gift for anyone outside Say Si, even though I had many ideas. Darn, I bet if I have this Shin-dig my parents won't let me have anything for my birthday... which I never usually have anything anyway, and I'm having a Sweet 16 in March, but come on... I'm going to be 16!! I've waited all my life to be 16! (No kidding.) Well, I'll figure something out. In other news I'm still talking to that boy, George. Heh. I just like saying "that boy, George." Thanksgiving was okay, I played the Smiths, "Meat is Murder" to humor myself at the expense of the meat eaters. It was all in fun and I wasn't quite serious, but a few people got mad at me, and so I persisted to turn it louder. Ha ha. That reminds me! I love it in books when authors give their characters lines of, "Ha ha." Just straight to the point... I guess I'm about done here!

Isn't it also a sin to take this?

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Eigth Level of Hell - the Malebolge!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Moderate
Level 2 (Lustful)	Low
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Low
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very Low
Level 7 (Violent)	Low
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Very High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Low

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

Boredom.

I have a million things to do and yet it's all the same... here I am, caught up in a funk over some boy I decided I didn't like. I think it's rather hilarious. Oh well, who cares anyway. I believe I'm most likely talking to myself so I'll continue blabbing. Though about what i just don't know. I should be reading a zillion books... and memorizing The Raven, though I just don't care to. I don't even care to finish this.

Christmas List!

•Scarves! (The wooly kind)

•Scarves! (The silky kind)

•Sunglasses! (The movie-star kind)

•Belts! (The big buckle crazy kind)

•Shoes?

•Francesca Lia Block books

•Amêlie DVD

•Uh.......

An epiphany shot down.

"I'm so happy, I know what I want to do... I'm going to write every second of the spare time I have. When I'm not, I'll be helping people and making purses."

"You need to be working on your Sweet 16. You can't do anything else. I don't want to see you slacking."

"What? It's not like I'll be doing nothing... and I don't want to work on my sweet 16 all the freaking time! It's not that hard... I mean it's not rocket science."

And so, I'm wrting and making purses. See ya in a few weeks, internet!

Letting Go.

It's been awhile, everyone. A week. I'm still the same though, maybe sadder, maybe gladder... maybe more up-key. First Friday was hella fun, I love First Fridays. And I love my friends. So here's to letting go, after months of holding on, slipping past... I hope I can break free, drop the ball, or some jazz like that. I saw him in the sky, in a painting, on a hill, I looked right out my window and he stared back at me. I see him in the distance, behind me, at the bar, I drink up hope but I'll spit it up... I never wanted to be this shadow, always lurking, seeing images, breathing dreams that are too beautiful to live in. But, it's alright because there's beauty in the breakdown.